Two metaphors get used very frequently to describe the workplace: family and team. So, I thought it was worth exploring how and when one or the other of these models apply to leadership at work, and, at least from my view, when they don’t.

I’ve had the privilege of leading in organizations at every stage, from being a founder and CEO of a mid-size organization to serving as a mid-level executive in very large organizations. As a result, my first thought was about how family or team might apply based on the scale of the organization. Of course, when you’re just getting a company off the ground, it certainly has the feel of a family. Often, people who already have strong relationships come together to build something, and there is a camaraderie and real affection that certainly resembles healthy family relationships. But even in these early stages, a team is also a fair metaphor, because the new company is typically rallying around a set of goals and objectives, and doing everything they can to put the “best team on the field” to win. As organizations scale, it becomes more difficult to envision the organization as a family (unless you happen to come from a family with hundreds of members, which might present its own challenges). And, similarly, even on the largest teams, such as American football, you still have significantly smaller numbers than even a small to mid-size company. So, in both cases, the metaphor seems to lose applicability as we grow.  On this dimension, one obvious thought is that as organizations scale, they break work down into subsidiaries, divisions, workgroups, etc., so the potential still exists for that part of the organization to feel like a team or a family.

So, is it as simple as smaller companies feel more like families, and as you grow, they feel more like teams? Then, as a leader, you just apply one or both thoughts to your part of the organization, as you feel like it? Well, I think there might be a few more important differences…

Let’s hit a tough one that I had to learn early in my leadership journey: performance. If things aren’t working out with a member of a company or a player on a team, the leader, such as a manager or a coach, can take the action to part ways with that member or player. To put it mildly, that’s a little more awkward to do in a family. (Although, I should point out, based on both observation and experience, parents and kids often want to “fire” each other during those challenging teen years). Along the almost two-decade journey I’ve had at SailPoint, I’ve had some tough calls to make with colleagues who turned out not to be a fit professionally, but were very compatible with our culture, and therefore, felt like “part of the family”.  That’s when I first learned that the family metaphor, which can serve leaders well as they establish tight linkages in early-stage companies, can be challenging, particularly as you grow to a larger scale. So, my counsel is to tread a little carefully when using familial language in a company that’s built to perform and grow at a high level. It feels good, but it sure is hard to fire your brother or sister or son or daughter…

Let’s flip it around to the advantages, and possible concerns, of the team metaphor. First, there’s the obvious point that teams are comprised of people who are choosing to work together to achieve an objective. (In contrast, most of us didn’t get to pick our parents or our siblings, even if we really like them!) Team leaders pay for, and expect, high levels of output, and take action to remedy the situation when that doesn’t occur. In that sense, teams are always working to get better, both individually, and as a unit. Finally, high-achieving teams create a lot of loyalty among the members and can attract others who resonate with the team’s values, mission and objectives, and work to join the team in any way they can. This all sounds great! So, are there any concerns?

Well, yes, and it’s the reverse of what I said about family earlier. On some teams, there’s almost a “survival of the fittest” mentality, where those who can’t keep up are cast aside, no matter the circumstances. In other situations, the team can develop unhealthy factions, where they forget an adage that we repeat often around SailPoint: “The enemy is out there.” This simply implies that everyone in our organization is “on the same team”, trying to work toward similar goals.  While we sometimes need to work through difficult challenges, we should always do so from the mindset of collaborating together as teammates.

So, is the best metaphor a family or is it a team? As you’ve likely now gathered, I’m a big fan of the team concept. It seems to fit the situation of leading organizations best. However, the trick I’ve tried to get better at and help infuse into our culture, is to manage and lead a team with “family values” like caring, compassion, and understanding. This is why I even talk about “loving” my colleagues and teammates. As one of my favorite board members once said to me, “I’ll love you up to and including the day I might decide I have to let you go to make room for another leader”. (Note: Lucky for me, that hasn’t happened yet). So, my counsel is simple. Let’s focus on building great teams that perform at high levels, remain agile, and recognize and reward great performance. But let’s do so in supportive and caring cultures, almost like healthy families.  Because, as my last post in this series pointed out, even while we work toward business goals and objectives, we’re always “human at work”.